He was a scary bear

I want me a heavy dose of April.
Everything will be better in April.
All my troubles will magically vanish in April.
It will all fix itself in April.
I just have to sit and wait until April.
Is that how it works?

-Allan

RATTLESNAKE!

So he says, "For $.50 extra, you can get a large. You want a large?" Won't the medium cup be able to hold a small child? No? SURE THEN! Large it is. I'm man enough to drink a small, under-developed nation's water supply's worth of Coke. You have convinced me sir. But wait! Surely a normal straw does not have the power to transport all of this liquid from the container to my mouth! I must use a Red Vine? Can I buy only one Red Vine? I need the entire box of Red Vines for some undisclosed reason? Okay. I'll take a box of Red Vines then. Golly mister, you sure are helpful.

-Allan

Sabina and Franz

I know that I have lived vicariously
None of this is my own
I remember days, things
I'm sure that they are not memories

I know that I have lived vicariously
I've talked to people in places I have never been
I laughed about hidden jokes that aren't mine
I remembered all the wrong people

I know that I have lived vicariously
In your city, on your street
Hanging around your favorite places
Sat in that cafe on 4th

Because I have lived vicariously
I forgot how to live on my own

-Allan

There's a song about this

Dear rain,

I am no longer in love with you and this relationship cannot drag on any longer. It was fun at first and we had our giggles, but now I see you are nothing more than just water that falls from the sky for an extended period of time before stopping. Remember the times when you were soothing and actually helped me fall asleep? What happened to those days? You've kept me up for two nights in a row with your "pitter patters" and "drip, drip, drips". I dozed off during a test today because you couldn't talk it out at a reasonable hour of the day. It's always "me, me, me" now. I have feelings too. I quite enjoy not having to make mad dashes from building to building for fear of getting all of my possessions wet. Also, I think you should ease up on the evaporation. You're starting to sound like hail.

Love,

Allan

house of leaves

Sometimes people are difficult to deal with. I probably shouldn't rope in people in general into that statement. It's just a few select individuals. I generally find people to be nice.

You can't give me crap and then request that I do something for you. You can't come to me for help and when I tell you I honestly can't help, you tell me I'm useless. You can't try to be my friend when you don't have an ounce of respect for me. You should also stop asking me questions that don't pertain to anything of great importance. IF MY ANSWER IS NOT GOING TO SAVE A HUNGRY VILLAGE IN AN UNDER-DEVELOPED COUNTRY, DON'T ASK IT! In short, you should go die in a hole.

I don't know why dying in a hole is the preferred method for you to die by.

I really don't know if it stems from their ego or they just have no concept of how human interactions work. I love puppies.

-Allan

The damage revealed the cost

This is the big four oh....oh.

400 posts. I've been doing this for about a year and I've accumulated a total of 400 posts. No mistakes this time.

It is at this point in a boy's life that he must talk about being at this point in his life.

I would've done something spectacular with this post if I were famous, but I am not so nothing spectacular will happen. Maybe by 500 I'll be a billionaire and dumb promises like Michael Scott. Then it'll be great.

Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to whore myself out more to the interbot.

-Allan

The shivers, I got.

I question my character sometimes.

Char⋅ac⋅ter [kar-ik-ter]- n. 1. the aggregate of features and traits that form the individual nature of some person or thing; 2. a part or role, as in a play or film.

-Allan

These Arms Were Snakes

My long, arduous journey down the college application road is coming to a close. What is the first thing that I did when I clicked that "submit" button my friends had been talking about for months? I went on facebook and updated my status to something I thought was witty. Good times.

Now I just have to stay on life support until the letters start rolling in. Though I am sure I won't get in, I really would like to go to Skidmore. If not, I just hope one of the other colleges take me. They're all very similar schools so the only sad part will be that I am not at Skidmore. Let's hope the other sad part won't be that I didn't get into a single college.

Assuming I do get into college, I'll actually be carrying a lot of my friends with me to the East coast. I don't have that many friends so it's not a hard task. Haha. I also will have to deal with all the people (one person actually) I don't want to ever see again since apparently they'll be tagging along too and they'll probably want to hang out with my friends when I'm hanging out with my friends. Let's hope Oregon adopts me instead. Haha. I wanted to get away from everything I am used to here which sadly includes the people I want to spend time with. Maybe it's a complete douche thing to do, but I wanna see what I can do just completely by myself. By that I don't mean I'll move out and not talk to people ever again. I mean like living on my own, forming new relationships on my own, paying the non-existent bills and child support on my own, etc. Maybe I'll see that I can't actually survive on my own and come crawling back to Oakland. Who knows?

In other very depressing news, These Arms Are Snakes is no longer a band. Boo.

-Allan

Jen don't wanna be seen

Today, I had a brilliant idea. The problem was that I was in the car, it was very early in the morning, and I had nothing to write it down on. So I tried to cling onto that idea while doing a bunch of other things like walking and not running into people in Chinatown. It's a lot harder than it sounds. I got home, sat down, tried to recreate the idea I was super stoked about in the car and I just couldn't. That's probably a sign for why I shouldn't write poetry.

I'm just trying to be productive. I have too much free time and I figure that if I am not going to do work, I might as well pursue that artsty fartsy side of me I pretend exists. That endeavor is very expensive.

That's just code for "I'm pretty tired of blogging".

-Allan

Paper Stapler

I'm 100% determined to get this tattoo. Just sayin'. It's either this or try to fork up the cash for a full sleeve because I'm so hip like that. Have I mentioned I'll never probably get a "real" job?

-Allan

All my titles now will involve paper.

I am trying very hard to push this blog in a different direction than me just rambling on about nothing. That requires me to actually plan out something to talk about and stick with that something. I'm sorry if you like rambling, but this is what I want.

With that said, it becomes all that more difficult. I don't wanna just put something down if I don't feel like it will entertain in some way which in turn makes nothing I write seem entertaining. I also am in no way motivated to put so much effort into this thing when like all of 2-3 people read it. AdSense gives me a better sense of how many times someone actually looks at this blog, but I can almost guarantee that 80% of those views are from me. Now I am just complaining.

What I am really getting to is that you should just donate money to me. I can up the production of this blog and it will end up looking like your favorite movie. Don't you want it to look like your favorite movie? Of course you do.

I have a last.fm account. Add me?

Click it yo.

-Allan

Mo' Paper

No, this blog does not get easier to read. It will never in any shape or form make your eyes feel comfortable when staring at it. Sorry.

-The Management.

Paper

Recently, I've consumed a lot of Pepsi. Pepsi is one of my preferred beverages because it says "caffeine" somewhere on the packaging and I find that oddly reassuring. That is, however, not a valid reason to consume the amount of Pepsi that I have consumed.

At this point you probably think that I have just given you my answer to the age-old question: "Coke or Pepsi?"

To tell you the truth, I don't know. I personally think they both taste kind of the same. You drink enough of both and they all just start tasting like one another. It's all just sugar water in the end so why the hell does that matter?

If Pepsi and Coke had a baby, you'd get a clogged artery.

-Allan.

Like leads to like like

Owl City. We are going to talk about Owl City. Just sayin'. You can leave now if you want.

But you'll stay. They always stay.

I don't know how I feel about this city of owls yet. On one hand, I kinda like his voice and to some extent admire what he is doing, but one the other I hate how "cute" and "bubbly" all his songs are and I just have this thing against people playing the laptop. It's silly and just too simple (says the guy who probably couldn't do it himself). I probably don't know what I am talking about, but a lot of the time there aren't even any real instruments involved. There are programs to emulate any instrument and that totally takes the fun out of it. Plus, it's really weird watching a dude stand in front of a laptop live. The negatives are outweighing the positives so I will say this: I secretly adore "Fireflies".



At least he knows what music fans really want. An adult size onesie.

-Allan

P.S. CLICK MY ADS!!! D:

Pretty and rainbows

Remember Happy Meals? Of course you do. Remember when they would occasionally have different toys for boys and girls? Like one gets a Hot Wheels and the other gets a Barbie? I remember being so completely bummed every time I got a Barbie. I couldn't wrap my mind around why on earth the person behind the counter would give me a freakin' Barbie. They saw that I was a boy because I was the one who ordered the damn Happy Meal. Your company made a distinction that little boys got a piece of plastic with wheels on it and girls got a piece of plastic with hair sticking out of it. SO WHY GIVE ME A DAMN BARBIE?!

Of course, I realize now that it was probably because they ran out of cars and really didn't want to fight an eight-year-old boy over not getting a toy in their Happy Meal. So we got the left over Barbies. What did I do to these Barbies? What any little boy would do. Lick them.



So it's 2010. I want this blog to head in a more organized direction. Less rambling. More themes. Less assholes. More references to things that you probably won't pick up on. Less about me. More about me. Less about sad. More about happy. Life is in the pits.

Also, my new New Year's Resolution is to make one U.S dollar through adsense. That is why you'll notice there are ads on my blog now. They in no way get in the way of your reading so I might as well right? It's hard out here for a not-famous person on the internet.

-Allan