It's a fucking conspiracy

Zhees here ees Florence and the Machine (A.K.A Florence Welch and her backing band "The Machine"). She's quite good. Really in your face but also really far away from your face holding cupcakes. She also covered "Hospital Beds" by Cold War Kids and made me love Cold War Kids again (not that I ever stopped loving them). Click it and listen and stuffs.

Billy Mays died. What the fuck? Couldn't Lil' Wayne be next? But seriously, that's kinda sad. Who else is gonna yell "OXYCLEAN!!!" at me? Who else will convince me to buy useless shit without thinking twice? WHO ELSE WILL DAWN HIS AWESOME BEARD?! Not the fucking ShamWow guy, that's for sure.

Watch more famous people die in the following weeks. Then at the end of it all, someone's gonna step up and claim responsibility for all their deaths then explain to us his (or her! see how smoothly I avoid sexism?) intricate plan and how killing all these people will actually bring the fall of mankind. That's right, Bob Dylan may hold to key to our survival. Or not...

-Allan

Desensitizing Fraudulent Moosi

Today is just a horrible day. Nothing's going well. Bunch of famous people I don't care much about died. My SAT scores suck and I need to retake it. I feel defeated as fuck. Blah blah blah.

It's funny how everyone is all of a sudden a Michael Jackson fan. Yea, the guy basically had us all eating out of his hands at some point in history and he should be recognized for that, but all the bullshit "RIP Michael Jackson" statuses on facebook and the ton of internet blah blah from kids who know "Thriller" because of Fall Out Boy is stupid. Now if for some reason you are reading this and are thinking "What the fuck?! I am a true Jackson fan and I feel offended! This guy's an asshole!", shhh...baby's sleeping. :D

Cynical eccentrical (which is a reach word, truthiness).

Meh.

"I ♥ Huckabees" makes absolutely no sense. Today may have been one of the worse days to view that movie since it's been so bad. I hate the way Mark Wahlberg talks. Sorry Marky Mark.

If I can convince someone to make soap with me, I'm fucking doing it.

-Allan

Asphyxiate

I cannot not spell that word if my life depended on it.

I was watching Marie Antoinette (the Kirsten Dunst one) and there was this one part where the priest guy was like "Il n'y a pas triste" or something. I had no clue what "triste" meant exactly, but I remembered it being like bad or not happy or something. That's probably why I fail at French. Because I don't know exactly what a lot of words mean and only kinda get the gist of them and it doesn't make test grades look good. :D

Then again, that's kinda how English works for me too. And Chinese. And Pork-Spanish.

Parasite Eve has been beaten. Now I'm onto Parasite Eve II. Is it sad how stoked I am about the graphics in the second game even though they technically are hella dated in 2009? Yes it is. I find everything about the second game more enjoyable except my old friend the super shitty Resident Evil/Silent Hill/Just about any survival horror game of the 90's control scheme. You try dodging attacks when you can barely maneuver! RAWR! MORE COMPLAIN ABOUT STUPID SHIT!

I have to constantly keep myself stimulated with movies. The in between time is just like blank space. I've watched so many in a row that I don't believe I've absorbed any of them. It's kinda just like "Oh, okay...next!"

HUZZAH!

-THE ABOMINDALALALADINGDONG SNOWFEET

JAM

I reverted into some weird Nirvana phase at 8 am. I should stop waking up so early. Not that I don't like Nirvana.

Cross country practice did not start today because everyone was "busy" so I didn't wanna end up being just me there with the coaches. No offense coaches.

I'm done with "The Office". For now at least. Now I'm sad. I have nothing to watch until September. I have a feeling I would hate that show if I actually had to work at an office. Then it would just be like "NUH UH! NO ONE LOOKS LIKE JENNA FISCHER AT MY WORK PLACE!"

I'm good at making absolutely nothing happening in my life sound exciting aren't I?

-Allan

You fight that monster

My turn offs include: Not super awesome graphics, set camera angles, that really annoying movement scheme where the up button only makes you walk forward and the back button makes you walk slowly backwards and makes turning a bitch, not being able to shoot over-shoulder, giant monster thing that screams "STARS!!" and basically rapes the shit out you...

Okay, I like (love and would love to get married to) Resident Evil 3, but some of the old-fashion stuff I just can't take anymore. Anyone who has since played RE4 or 5 can maybe agree with me that the control scheme for those games are way better. It makes killing zombies way easier and it's really nice to see what you're shooting at. Then you revisit the old games and it's like "...we should see other people."

There are also these also things in game that force you to make decisions that affect how the rest of the game goes. The very first one you make is whether or not to face Nemesis within 5-6 minutes of the game starting. Nemesis, for those of you who don't know, is a giant zombie thing in a trench coat that stalks you throughout the entire god damn game because that's what he was made to do. He's even on the cover! The full title of the game is actually "Resident Evil 3: Nemesis"! He's suppose to be a big deal. So no way in hell I'm gonna choose to fight that right? Wrong! There's this problem with me that if I tell myself not to do things, I more than 90% of the time end up doing them. So screaming "DON'T CHOOSE FIGHT!!" over and over only lead to me choosing to fight and being pummeled to the floor like a meat sack. Here's where the not so awesome controls kicked in and forced me to spend an extra second with my decaying, fleshy friend.

But who's complaining? I get to shoot zombies. Plus I spent a good hour updating hacks and all that technomalogical BS just to get one PS1 game to work so I am gonna play it. I will play the shit out of it.

I'm a potty mouth. :O

-Allan

Seasaw

I watched a video today of our awesome, awesome president swatting a fly like it was nothing. I would've loved it even more if he had pulled out his presidential fly-killing chopsticks out. Jokes aside, the first thing that popped into my head was "PETA is gonna be piiiisssedd!" Of course, I was joking and didn't think they would actually get involved, but I guess I'm really wrong. Well, I they kinda only made some comment about the incident, no anti-fly killing protests, but really? I'll take being reborn as a fly and swatted by a president for saying this, but that's just really stupid to worry about a fucking fly. This is where we are as a country. We have time to talk about a fly that was killed on TV. (Ignore that, we don't need more complaining about the country)

I don't like PETA. Let's put that out there. I love animals. PETA "loves" animals. Hooray!? I mean, some of the stuff they do is awesome. Save the shit out of those animals. Forget people. Animals are the ONLY thing that matters. Here's what I believe (don't talk to me if you don't feel the same way :D): People should be the most important thing to other people. Not animals. Not trees and whatnot. Work on keeping people alive. Work on reaching that point where were not just mindless consumer dipshits who just waste and waste and I believe a lot of problems that aren't people will be remedied.

Maybe I'm talking out of my ass and my second ass when I say that. Maybe PETA will try and take me down. That would be tight.

I'm into season four of "The Office". I am excited. Sure. Excited. But also not because it will not last me all Summer. But cross country practice starts sometime next week I believe. I guess that'll keep me busy for a while. Then maybe when I beat the living poopies out of Patapon 2 and Resident Evil 3, I'll actually do something productive.

I might look into making soap (for cereals). Then I'll start a fight club. Then I'll take down civilization. WOO!

-Allan

Summer days, I can't stand the Summer days

You will luff it! YOU WILL LUFF THE HELL OUT OF IT! The song that is. Isn't it a great song? Unless you hate cute. Then you're a fucker. >=O The good thing about songs by Olivia Lufkin is that should they feature guitars, they are usually really easy to figure out. Hooray!

So I believe I may be obsessed with "The Office". The good ol' Amurcan one of course. Great show. And Dwight K. Schrute may very well be my new hero.

I don't watch a whole lot of TV nor do I catch onto things very fast so bear with me.

I wanna see a Chinese version of "The Office". It would be weird. China would probably end up banning it. Hahaha.

I wonder if I blogged about stuff like this while I'm in China, would they like shut me down and deport me? Because a lot of people blog in China and some of them who talk a lot of shit or do things that the government don't approve of have been shut down I believe.

I've googled Tienanmen Square like once while I was in China and my uncle was like "Yea....don't do that..."

This is me bored. Hello. Time to quit being a panzy bitch and actually attempt to play Resident Evil 3 on mah PSP. Can't quite remember if the L2/R2 buttons were needed...I hope they aren't.

-Allan

Isabella stand a little bit taller

I don't think I can have nightmares anymore. Simply because I haven't had one in so long (The zombie invasion dreams don't count 'cause I like them). Last night was about as close as it gets and it sucked. Instead of having nightmares, I just keep waking up every other second like some paranoid freak and thus leads to a lack of sleep. This implies I was scared of something. Why? Because I watched "Zodiac" again? Really? Sure.

-Allan

Sailing Free

So after going on about how I'm pretty anti-consumerist in my head, all I have to say right now.....



WANT!!!! o,o"

But all I waste my money on is guitar stuff. I guess that's better than a juicer. Right?

-Allan

I like science fiction and candy

I am very scared at how easily distracted I am. Like I will try to look something up on the interbot and end up not getting to it three hours later when I wake up from a nap after reading about naps instead and remember that was why I was on the interbot in the first place.

I am attempting to play this game called "Sengoku Basara: Battle Heroes" which in English would be the PSP sequel of a game you probably don't know called "Devil Kings". I really don't know why I'm trying to play it since it's in Japanese and I really hate not knowing what I'm doing. Especially in a game like this where there's a lot of fancy combo-ing and confusing movements. I guess maybe because Olivia's new single, "Sailing Free", is the theme song? But it's like the ending theme so I actually have to beat one of the story modes and I can't understand anything and it makes me sad. Blah blah blah.

Within the past 40 or so hours, I've watched:

-The Rocky Horror Picture Show
-Elizabethtown (again...)
-Gran Torino
-Mumford

All of which you probably should go see.

TRIVA! TRIVIA!!

If you can tell me how both "The Rocky Horror Picture Show" and "Breakfast at Tiffany's" relates to "Elizabethtown" all within the same scene, you win an all expense trip to....East Oakland.

Good day.

-Allan

No Tyler, It's Our Head

I also have a love-hate relationship with Starbucks. I don't like places where there's like a ton of fru fru drinks and it's impossible to just find "coffee" anywhere on the menu. I personally feel like an asshole asking "So like...can I just get coffee coffee?" so I never do it. I only say that because I do it in a very asshole-y manner. But they make coffee and they're not too bad so I guess we can still talk Starbucks. :D

Wanna know what I'm addicted to at this very moment? Crack. Yup. I've developed a crack addiction. I'm also addicted to banana chips, but crack is cheaper. Crack, crack, crack.

My friend has a dog named Gus. He's kinda awesome because he's pretty old for a dog and just kinda does whatever he wants now. Namely stand on my feet and make it impossible to move without knocking him over. Haha. He also randomly stole a potty while I was following him. Thank god I didn't step in it.

So like....I'm officially a senior? Hooray? I have to worry about the rest of my life for reals now? No wai...

And I still don't know what I am required to do tomorrow. I just know I have to show up at 7:30 pm and be ready to be the best helper monkey I can be.

I'm not really addicted to crack. But I really am addicted to crack.

-Allan

Goodbye.

Finals are not fun. I just wanna get them over with. I could really care less what I get by this point. I've fucked this year up too so all I can hope now is that by Senior year I'll change.

I leave myself completely in the hands of fate, luck and all that jazz. Jazz. No jazz? Jazzy McJazzkins. They seems to know what I want better than I do.

I had this weird dream last night about giant fish. Like my parents were hell bent on raising these ugly, brownish/green fish that were the size of a donkey or something. Our backyard was turned into a giant fish tank and the back door actually led into the tank (so there was basically no back door unless you wanna drown or something). We started off with one. I didn't like it because it was just creepy. Then I remember walking by the door (which was made of glass so the fish could see me) and the damn thing started ramming into the door. I ran into the next room thinking it would stop if it didn't see me, but it kept ramming until finally the door broke and water just poured into the house. Then the fish for some reason was able to glide across the surface of the floor and started attacking furniture and stuff. It eventually spotted me and started gliding towards me, but someone (random person in my house?) rammed into the fish and knocked it on it's side. It couldn't get up or anything. We decided to tie it up against a wall and wait for it to die from lack of water. It didn't. My parents apparently really wanted it and refused to believe that it broke into the house and start going apeshit on everything. Nope. They instead got more! HOORAY!

Then I stopped dreaming about giant fish.

I you were given the chance to learn one tid bit of information about ANYTHING (this includes the ingredients to SPAM), what would it be? I'd personally want the identity of the Zodiac killer or like what was behind the whole thing (in case it was aliens!). It's just something that really interests me and makes me wish I was alive in the 60's.

Okay.

-Allan

Iron Lungs

Maybe you've seen this picture before. It's a room full of people who can't breathe (by themselves). Can you imagine that?

I really like that picture. It would make a great album cover. Try to steal my idea and I swear I'll find you.

I've developed a "thing" for Audrey Hepburn.

Hooray otters!

-Allan

Chinese Coke Whores

SAT TOMORROW! HOORAY!!! I can finally take this big, bad test after all the suspense and excitement!

I'm a huge dork so I get really excited when I figure out how certain noises are produced on the guitar. All of them involve fancy pedals that I can't afford, but it helps me narrow down my long (and expensive) list of guitar pedals I should buy to like 4-5.

Were gonna talk about photography....

I (for some reason) just really don't like using the flash. I'll risk super grainy and pictures that are WAYYY dark to see before I use the flash. End of trying to sound like I know what I'm talking about.

I say that a lot. You win a prize if you can count ALL the times I've said that.

Ooo...interactive.

-Allan

Double Visible

I really want all these tests to be over. I can't take it anymore. This state of not being able to do anything I want.

For some reason, James really thinks that Mr. Asshole will win an award next year from the Tech department. He thinks because he's got a horrible attitude towards people who ask him to do stuff and he swears a lot out loud, that automatically makes Mr. Asshole who doesn't ever do any work and is just good at kissing ass the one who will receive the award. I mean, they normally give these things out to people who do work and are really good at it right?

We had this awards ceremony today. Basically, all the academic departments hand out awards to kids who excel in certain subjects and it's just a complete waste of time for the rest of us who don't get anything. I mean, the kids who win already know they win before hand so it's really pointless for the rest of us to sit there and watch them. Sure, they deserve recognition, but cutting into two whole class periods is kinda ridiculous.

Now I'm just really tired. Today has been rough. College counselor lady officially thinks I'm crazy. I hope. There were some really awkward moments, but I think the meeting was actually really helpful. It just made me realize I'll need to work a lot this Summer (which I'll hopefully keep up with), but I guess I'll play along.

Tomorrow is study day. I'm going to waste it! :D

-Allan

Another night of sleeping with the lights on...

CHICAGO! CHICAGO! CHICAGO!!!!

I can't seem to stay awake. Maybe I should lay off the coffee and try to normal out a bit. But coffee is so good to me...

I get to see my college counselor tomorrow. I haven't seen her in a few months. I have a feeling it's going to be kinda awkward and depressing because she's just gonna tell me I can't get into college.

Today was the last day of French III. We got candy and stuff! :D I got an 80% on my listening final even though I had no clue what the hell I was doing until about 3/4's of the test had gone by. You see, we were listening to conversations between two people and the questions mostly required you to choose to most logical response to the question being asked at the end of each dialogue. For some reason, I thought the question wasn't at the end so I spent most of the test just guessing. Hahaha. Then I read the directions and was like "Oh.....fuck!!!"

There's a Jeff Buckley documentary that's out right now (I think). I wanna see it.

I think this whole pop punk fad is one of the worst things to have happened to music. And by "pop punk", I mean those bands 12 year olds swoon over. You know the ones I'm talking about. The whiny vocals, the skinny jeans, all that hair product and the thoughtless lyrics just needs to stop. I mean, I'm not saying all of these bands are bad. It's just that 90% of them that are popular right now are. I only say this because I don't know. I can't take it so it's wrong? Hahaha.

Is it stupid to be upset with music? It is. It's been around for so long that things have unconsciously organized itself into neat little formats and formulas whether you like it or not. By now, it's just a matter of how good you are at making these your own which not many artists are doing. Like why do people start bands and play music? To get famous and hopefully make a living out of it so you don't need a normal job. It's so much easier to look pretty, win the hearts of 12 year olds, and and just go with that than not look pretty and try to actually put good music out.

"Oh, you're the fucking expert now aren't you?!"

YES! >=O

I'm ready to not wake up until well past noon thank you very much.

-Allan

Whiny whine whine

So none of my teachers apparently know me well enough to write a letter of recommendation for me. Hooray. I'm pretty fucked then I guess. Country band. Get ready to get back together.

But hey, at least I tried right?

Whatever. I give up. Yes, I really would like to go to college, but I'm sick and tired of people telling me that it is going to define the rest of my life. Yes, it can have a significant impact on how I spend the rest of my life, but at the same time, I don't care a whole lot about being rich and successful. As I see it, I'm perfectly content working some fucking dead end job and going nowhere with life.

Maybe that's just me trying to cope with failing. Who knows?

On a lighter note, well....there isn't a lighter note.

I'm ready to move away from everyone here. They all just about piss me off.

-Allan

Funcoland

Do you remember Funcoland? Do they still have Funcolands? Is that what they were called?

So occasionally, I like to play artist (doctor is over-rated). My current doodle of doom is what I like to call Audrey Hepzombie. Yes. This requires the watching of the "Breakfast At Tiffany's" even though Mickey Rooney's character is supposed to be hella offensive to Asians so I should be offended? Whatever.


Here's what I've very roughly gotten done so far. It probably won't end up looking much better. Maybe.

School's almost over. I actually want it to keep going. Because as awesome as my schedule is for Senior year, I'm scared for college. And report cards. And sitting at home the entire Summer after not being able to motivate myself to do anything.

This is the point in life where my blog bores the hell out of me. Like I don't even want to do it anymore. Part of me really wants to just retreat from the internet because it's just too much.

-Allan